If you’re like many of us, the holidays come with an initial sense of excitement but also maybe a little bit of I don’t know..panic.

Add a sprinkle of differing opinions about if masks are political, some of your loved ones not being able to come because they’re not done with their 10 day post-symptom isolation, and the fact that there’s the normal yearly questions about your relationship status and the triggering remarks your mom makes about your job..let’s face it, the 2020 holidays have brought a new flavor of anxiety (unless you’ve lost your sense of taste..in that case you and I have that in common).

All jokes aside, this year as everyone has said many times before, has been rough.

With the holiday festivities rolling around the corner we may be navigating how to stay safe while still trying to see family, how to make everyone happy especially when some family members don’t agree, how to process disappointment, loss, and loneliness, all the while feeling lost in the midst of an unclear future.

Although these issues can’t all be fixed and wrapped up with a Christmas bow, there are some helpful tools you can use to avoid excess anxiety or feelings of being out of control.

Here’s 5 things you can do to help with holiday anxiety this year:

1. Cut out the habits that add to your anxiety

Caffeine is a nervous system stimulant. If you know this time of year already adds a side of anxiety to your already full plate, try cutting this out for the next few months. You may be surprised with how much this seemingly small change can help your overall mood.

On top of this, try limiting or cutting out alcohol. Although alcohol may relax you for a bit, your body naturally crashes after the substance is out of your system, which can add to much more anxiety in the long run.

2. Check in with the present moment

Right here, right now in this moment, you are safe and okay. The future hasn’t happened yet and going over it in your mind usually isn’t helpful. It may feel like you’re thinking through what could go wrong so you can avoid it, but aside from some healthy planning this way of spiral thinking can get you stuck.

Try a mindfulness technique like meditating, doing a quick breathing exercise, or going on a walk without distractions. Staying in the present moment can help to significantly reduce the temptation for your mind to wander to anxious thoughts which in turn, create feelings of anxiety.

3. Do “body scans” check ins

Paying attention to how you feel throughout the day can actually help you feel more in control. By identifying where you’re at on the “scale” of anxiety, you can feel more equipped to handle it.

Try setting an alarm on your phone that says “anxiety check in” and write down on a scale from 1-100 where you fall on it in that moment. Once you’ve written your number down, remind yourself that even if you’re number is on the higher end, you’re getting through it and still showing up—good work! Along with this, if you’ve had that number before, you have proof that you’ve made it through once and you can do it again.

4. Know the “Anxiety Formula”

Anxiety=overestimation of danger/underestimation of your ability to cope

When we have an inflated sense of danger paired with too low of a sense of being able to handle it, anxiety takes over.

Here’s an exercise you can do if you find yourself sinking into this common formula.

Ask yourself what would happen if your fears did in fact come true. Go down the list of “what ifs” and ask yourself what you would do if they all happened. The answer is, they probably wouldn’t be as big of a deal as they feel in your head, and your ability to handle them is much greater than your anxiety is making you feel in the moment.

5. Let some things “hit the floor”

With the holiday prep and the safety measures to avoid spreading the virus being implemented, sometimes we just can’t do it all—and that’s OK!

To help make this easier, try writing down your top priorities for this season. Is it to have quality time with family you haven’t seen in a while? Is it to make sure everyone has a safe and fun time together? If achieving these priorities means letting a few other things “hit the floor” like having a perfect spread of food, or having an immaculate house, then give yourself permission to focus on what matters most to you, you’ve got this!

Feeling overwhelmed with things feeling out of control?

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